Shona Is (allegedly) Here

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/stuff-we-like-updates-shopping-tips-and-neat-stuff/

Posted by SB Sarah

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152022

It’s time for another edition of Stuff We Like!

This month: some updates on past purchases, some tips on shopping, and some neat and useful stuff we’re loving.

Take a look:

Want to see? Just click that image above or click right here, and come shop with us!

And if you’d like to browse some more, we have a complete Stuff We Like archive, including past Gift Guides and other posts of our favorite items.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/stuff-we-like-updates-shopping-tips-and-neat-stuff/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152022

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sunday-sept-28-a-crafty-zoom-with-zoomy-crafts/

Posted by SB Sarah

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152076

This piece of literary mayhem is exclusive to Smart Bitches After Dark, but fret not. If you'd like to join, we'd love to have you!

Have a look at our membership options, and come join the fun!

If you want to have a little extra fun, be a little more yourself, and be part of keeping the site open for everyone in the future, we can’t wait to see you in our new subscription-based section with exclusive content and events.

Everything you’re used to seeing at the Hot Pink Palace that is Smart Bitches Trashy Books will remain free as always, because we remain committed to fostering community among brilliant readers who love romance.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sunday-sept-28-a-crafty-zoom-with-zoomy-crafts/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152076

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/vampires-contemporary-romance-more-2/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151987

Starling House

Starling House by Alix E. Harrow is $2.99! Sarah and I mentioned this in Hide Your Wallet. I think I wound up grabbing it in audio, but am notoriously bad at whittling down my audiobook library.

A grim and gothic new tale from New York Times bestselling author Alix E. Harrow about a small town haunted by secrets that can’t stay buried and the sinister house that sits at the crossroads of it all.

Eden, Kentucky, is just another dying, bad-luck town, known only for the legend of E. Starling, the reclusive nineteenth-century author and illustrator who wrote The Underland–and disappeared. Before she vanished, Starling House appeared. But everyone agrees that it’s best to let the uncanny house―and its last lonely heir, Arthur Starling―go to rot.

Opal knows better than to mess with haunted houses or brooding men, but an unexpected job offer might be a chance to get her brother out of Eden. Too quickly, though, Starling House starts to feel dangerously like something she’s never had: a home.

As sinister forces converge on Starling House, Opal and Arthur are going to have to make a dire to dig up the buried secrets of the past and confront their own fears, or let Eden be taken over by literal nightmares.

If Opal wants a home, she’ll have to fight for it.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes

RECOMMENDED: The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes by Cat Sebastian is $1.99! Carrie gave it a B+:

This book succeeds in that it gives an irresistible couple in sweet, goofy Rob and grumpy Marian. I adored this couple for their ability to think outside the box, their easy and complete acceptance of each other, and their banter.

Cat Sebastian returns to Georgian London with a stunning tale of a reluctant criminal and the thief who cannot help but love her.

Marian Hayes, the Duchess of Clare, just shot her husband. Of course, the evil, murderous man deserved what was coming to him, but now she must flee to the countryside. Unfortunately, the only person she can ask for help is the charismatic criminal who is blackmailing her—and who she may have left tied up a few hours before…

A highwayman, con artist, and all-around cheerful villain, Rob Brooks is no stranger to the wrong side of the law or the right side of anybody’s bed. He never meant to fall for the woman whose secrets he promised to keep for the low price of five hundred pounds, but how could he resist someone who led him on a merry chase all over London, left him tied up in a seedy inn, and then arrived covered in her husband’s blood and in desperate need of his help?

As they flee across the country—stopping to pick pockets, drink to excess, and rescue invalid cats—they discover more true joy and peace than either has felt in ages. But when the truth of Rob’s past catches up to him, they must decide if they are willing to reshape their lives in order to forge a future together.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

Jilted

Jilted by Vi Keeland is $2.99! This appears to be a standalone. A woman has a steamy moment at a wedding, only to later discover he’s the son of her boss.

From #1 New York Times bestseller Vi Keeland comes a brand-new slow-burn romance about a recovering jilted bride and her boss’s heartthrob son who get thrown together on the ultimate wedding assignment.

After getting ditched at the altar, every “I do” makes me want to scream.

Which is a problem, considering I’m an associate editor at Bride magazine.

Just when I thought my job couldn’t get any worse, I got roped into being a last-minute bridesmaid… and paired with Wilder Hayes.

Gorgeous, smug, and maddening. Cue the bickering, the sparks, and one very unexpected coat closet moment.

Not my finest hour… or was it? Because that kiss? Easily the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced.

At least I’ll never have to see him again.

Until Monday rolls around, and—surprise!—he’s my boss’s son and my new work shadow for the season.

It’s a match made in heaven…or hell. Only time will tell.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

A Dowry of Blood

A Dowry of Blood by S.T. Gibson is $2.99! This a f/f Gothic novel tied to Dracula. This was originally e-only and then received a successful print release.

This sensational novel tells the darkly seductive tale of Dracula’s first bride, Constanta.

This is my last love letter to you, though some would call it a confession. . .

Saved from the brink of death by a mysterious stranger, Constanta is transformed from a medieval peasant into a bride fit for an undying king. But when Dracula draws a cunning aristocrat and a starving artist into his web of passion and deceit, Constanta realizes that her beloved is capable of terrible things.

Finding comfort in the arms of her rival consorts, she begins to unravel their husband’s dark secrets. With the lives of everyone she loves on the line, Constanta will have to choose between her own freedom and her love for her husband. But bonds forged by blood can only be broken by death.

“A dizzying nightmare of a romance that will leave you aching, angry and ultimately hopeful.” —Hannah Whitten, New York Times bestselling author of For the Wolf

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/vampires-contemporary-romance-more-2/

You can find ordering info for this book here.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151987

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/habo-surprise-baby-between-a-widowed-rancher-and-a-teacher/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152052

This HaBO comes from Rita, who wants to find this romance:

I’m trying to track down a Harlequin romance and here’s what I remember:

Male lead (ML) is a widowed rancher with a son (possibly named Jason).

The book opens with the ML at a bar on the anniversary of his wife’s death.

He meets the female lead (FL), Susan, a teacher. They have a one-night stand, and she becomes pregnant.

Later, the ML’s son breaks his leg in a ranch accident and needs homeschooling.

Susan is assigned to tutor him and uses the opportunity to see what kind of father the ML is before telling him she’s pregnant.

Key scene: while gardening with the boy, Susan faints during an argument with the ML and blurts out something like, “Because I want to know what kind of father you’ll be to our child…” before passing out.

A doctor confirms the pregnancy. The ML then proposes marriage until the baby is born, intending to divorce afterward so the child will be born in wedlock.

The cover featured a blonde pregnant woman leaning toward a man, his hands resting on her belly.

If this sounds familiar, I’d be so grateful for the title and author!

I know we can find this one!

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/habo-surprise-baby-between-a-widowed-rancher-and-a-teacher/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152052

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/perfectly-punctual-2025

Posted by Jen

Yesterday we covered parentheses and quotation marks. Today, THE WORLD.

Or maybe just some extra apostrophes:

This Beth belongs to Congratutation.

The booties are anyone's guess.

I see lots of apostrophes where quotation marks should be, but I have to admit, this is the first time I've seen it the other way around:

I blame whatever madness drove the baker to add that L.

You might think periods would be easy to deal with, but if so, you're obviously a man with a death wish.

Or this baker:

I don't really know who St. David is, but I'm hoping against hope he's the patron saint of punctuation.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is the three period run, or if you want to get all technical about it, the ellipsis:

Because nothing conveys sincerity quite like trailing off mid...

With all these confusing options, you might be tempted to skip punctuation entirely, bakers. But that path has its own perils:

Yeah, way to go, Bob. I mean, that was soooo great, that thing you did. Scha.

My personal favorite, though, is the wild card mish-mosh of punctuation patter:

I dare you to do a dramatic reading of this cake.

And finally, the colon cake you've been waiting for:

Come back after we slice it for the semi-colons.

Thanks to Elizabeth C., Miriam A., Doreen L., Ariel F., Sarah C., Gernez, & Kim T. for the excuse to link to Victor Borge's phonetic punctuation.

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/perfectly-punctual-2025

charlie_stross_diary_feed

http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2025/09/interim-update.html

So, in the past month I've been stabbed in the right eye, successfully, at the local ophthalmology hospital.

Cataract surgery is interesting: bright lights, mask over the rest of your face, powerful local anaesthesia, constant flow of irrigation— they practically operate underwater. Afterwards there's a four week course of eye drops (corticosteroids for inflammation, and a two week course of an NSAID for any residual ache). I'm now long-sighted in my right eye, which is quite an experience, and it's recovered. And my colour vision in the right eye is notably improved, enough that my preferred screen brightness level for my left eye is painful to the right.

Drawbacks: firstly, my right eye has extensive peripheral retinopathy—I was half-blind in it before I developed the cataracts—and secondly, the op altered my prescription significantly enough that I can't read with it. I need to wait a month after I've had the second eye operation before I can go back to my regular ophthalmologist to be checked out and get a new set of prescription glasses. As I spent about 60 hours a week either reading or writing, I've been spending a lot of time with my right eye screwed shut (eye patches are uncomfortable). And I'm pretty sure my writing/reading is going to be a dumpster fire for about six weeks after the second eye is operated on. (New specs take a couple of weeks to come through from the factory.) I'll try cheap reading glasses in the mean time but I'm not optimistic: I am incapable of absorbing text through my ears (audiobooks and podcasts simply don't work for me—I zone out within seconds) and I can't write fiction using speech-to-text either (the cadences of speech are inimical to prose, even before we get into my more-extensive-than-normal vocabulary or use of confusing-to-robots neologisms).

In the meantime ...

I finished the first draft of Starter Pack at 116,500 words: it's with my agent. It is not finished and it is not sold—it definitely needs edits before it goes to any editors—but at least it is A Thing, with a beginning, a middle, and an end.

My next job (after some tedious business admin) is to pick up Ghost Engine and finish that, too: I've got about 20,000 words to go. If I'm not interrupted by surgery, it'll be done by the end of the year, but surgery will probably add a couple of months of delays. Then that, too, goes back to my agent—then hopefully to the UK editor who has been waiting patiently for it for a decade now, and then to find a US publisher. I must confess to some trepidation: for the first time in about two decades I am out of contract (except for the UK edition of GE) and the two big-ass series are finished—after The Regicide Report comes out next January 27th there's nothing on the horizon except for these two books set in an entirely new setting which is drastically different to anything I've done before. Essentially I've invested about 2-3 years' work on a huge gamble: and I won't even know if it's paid off before early 2027.

It's not a totally stupid gamble, though. I began Ghost Engine in 2015, when everyone was assuring me that space opera was going to be the next big thing: and space opera is still the next big thing, insofar as there's going to be a huge and ongoing market for raw escapism that lets people switch off from the world-as-it-is for a few hours. The Laundry Files was in trouble: who needs to escape into a grimdark alternate present where our politics has been taken over by Lovecraftian horrors now?

Indeed, you may have noticed a lack of blog entries talking about the future this year. It's because the future's so grim I need a floodlight to pick out any signs of hope. There is a truism that with authoritarians and fascists, every accusation they make is a confession—either a confession of something they've done, or of something they want to do. (They can't comprehend the possibility that not everybody shares their outlook and desires, to they attribute their own motivations to their opponents.) Well, for many decades now the far right have been foaming about a vast "international communist conspiracy", and what seems to be surfacing this decade is actually a vast international far-right conspiracy: from Trump and MAGA in the USA to Farage and Reform in the UK, to Orban's Fidesz in Hungary, to Putin in Russia and Erdogan in Turkey and Modi's Hindutva nationalists in India and Xi's increasingly authoritarian clamp-down in China, all the fascist insects have emerged from the woodwork at the same time. It's global.

I can discern some faint outlines in the darkness. Fascism is a reaction to uncertainty and downward spiraling living standards, especially among the middle classes. Over the past few decades globalisation of trade has concentrated wealth in a very small number of immensely rich hands, and the middle classes are being squeezed hard. At the same time, the hyper-rich feel themselves to be embattled and besieged. Those of them who own social media networks and newspapers and TV and radio channels are increasingly turning them into strident far-right propaganda networks, because historically fascist regimes have relied on an alliance of rich industrialists combined with the angry poor, who can be aimed at an identifiable enemy.

A big threat to the hyper-rich currently is the end of Moore's Law. Continuous improvements in semiconductor performance began to taper off after 2002 or thereabouts, and are now almost over. The tech sector is no longer actually producing significantly improved products each year: instead, it's trying to produce significantly improved revenue by parasitizing its consumers. ("Enshittification" as Cory Doctorow named it: I prefer to call the broader picture "crapitalism".) This means that it's really hard to invest for a guaranteed return on investment these days.

To make matters worse, we're entering an energy cost deflation cycle. Renewables have definitively won: last year it became cheaper to buy and add new photovoltaic panels to the grid in India than it was to mine coal from existing mines to burn in existing power stations. China, with its pivot to electric vehicles, is decarbonizing fast enough to have already passed its net zero goals for 2030: we have probably already passed peak demand for oil. PV panels are not only dirt cheap by the recent standards of 2015: they're still getting cheaper and they can be rolled out everywhere. It turns out that many agricultural crops benefit from shade: ground-dwellers coexist happily with PV panels on overhead stands, and farm animals also like to be able to get out of the sun. (This isn't the case for maize and beef, but consider root vegetables, brassicae, and sheep ...)

The oil and coal industries have tens of trillions of dollars of assets stranded underground, in the shape of fossil fuel deposits that are slightly too expensive to exploit commercially at this time. The historic bet was that these assets could be dug up and burned later, given that demand appeared to be a permanent feature of our industrial landscape. But demand is now falling, and sooner or late their owners are going to have to write off those assets because they've been overtaken by renewables. (Some oil is still going to be needed for a very long time—for plastics and the chemical industries—but it's a fraction of that which is burned for power, heating, and transport.)

We can see the same dynamic in miniature in the other current investment bubble, "AI data centres". It's not AI (it is, at best, deep learning) and it's being hyped and sold for utterly inappropriate purposes. This is in service to propping up the share prices of NVidia (the GPU manufacturer), OpenAI and Anthropic (neither of whom have a clear path to eventual profitability: they're the tech bubble du jour—call it dot-com 3.0) and also propping up the commercial real estate market and ongoing demand for fossil fuels. COVID19 and work from home trashed demand for large office space: data centres offer to replace this. AI data centres are also hugely energy-inefficient, which keeps those old fossil fuel plants burning.

So there's a perfect storm coming, and the people with the money are running scared, and to deal with it they're pushing bizarre, counter-reality policies: imposing tariffs on imported electric cars and solar panels, promoting conspiracy theories, selling the public on the idea that true artificial intelligence is just around the corner, and promoting hate (because it's a great distraction).

I think there might be a better future past all of this, but I don't think I'll be around to see it: it's at least a decade away (possibly 5-7 decades if we're collectively very unlucky). In the meantime our countries are being overrun by vicious xenophobes who hate everyone who doesn't conform to their desire for industrial feudalism.

Obviously pushing back against the fascists is important. Equally obviously, you can't push back if you're dead. I'm over 60 and not in great health so I'm going to leave the protests to the young: instead, I'm going to focus on personal survival and telling hopeful stories.

http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2025/09/interim-update.html

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/hide-your-wallet-september-23rd-release-week/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152049

Happy Tuesday!

September is winding down with some big releases. There’s a new Brynne Weaver, a couple road trip romances of different flavors, and Gothic horror.

What are you looking forward to this week? Let us know in the comments!

Alchemised

Author: SenLinYu
Released: September 23, 2025 by Del Rey
Genre: Romance, Science Fiction/Fantasy

In this riveting dark fantasy debut, a woman with missing memories fights to survive a war-torn world of necromancy and alchemy — and the man tasked with unearthing the deepest secrets of her past.

“What is it you think you’re protecting in that brain of yours? The war is over. Holdfast is dead. The Eternal Flame extinguished. There’s no one left for you to save.”

Once a promising alchemist, Helena Marino is now a prisoner—of war and of her own mind. Her Resistance friends and allies have been brutally murdered, her abilities suppressed, and the world she knew destroyed.

In the aftermath of a long war, Paladia’s new ruling class of corrupt guild families and depraved necromancers, whose vile, undead creatures helped bring about their victory, holds Helena captive.

According to Resistance records, she was a healer of little importance within their ranks. But Helena has inexplicable memory loss of the months leading up to her capture, making her enemies wonder: Is she truly as insignificant as she appears, or are her lost memories hiding some vital piece of the Resistance’s final gambit?

To uncover the memories buried deep within her mind, Helena is sent to the High Reeve, one of the most powerful and ruthless necromancers in this new world. Trapped on his crumbling estate, Helena’s fight—to protect her lost history and to preserve the last remaining shreds of her former self—is just beginning. For her prison and captor have secrets of their own . . . secrets Helena must unearth, whatever the cost.

Amanda: I am not ready.

Want to order this one? We’ve got the links you need!.

Ladies in Hating

Author: Alexandra Vasti
Released: September 23, 2025 by St. Martin's Griffin
Genre: Gothic, Historical: European, LGBTQIA, Romance
Series: Belvoir's Library #3

A pair of Gothic novelists trade rivalry for love in this swoony, steamy, sapphic Regency by USA Today bestselling author Alexandra Vasti.

Celebrated authoress Lady Georgiana Cleeve has achieved fame and fortune. Unfortunately, she’s also acquired an the enigmatic Lady Darling, whose spine-tingling plots appear to be pulled straight from Georgiana’s own manuscripts. What’s a stubborn, steely writer to do? Unmask her rival, of course.

But unmasking doesn’t go according to plan—because Lady Darling is actually Cat Lacey, the butler’s daughter and object of Georgiana’s very secret, very embarrassing teenage infatuation.

Cat Lacey has spent a decade clawing her family out of poverty. The last thing she needs is to be distracted by the stunning(ly pretentious) Lady Georgiana Cleeve. But Cat can’t seem to escape her infuriatingly beautiful rival—including at the eerie manor where they both plan to set their next books. The plot unexpectedly thickens, however, when the novelists find themselves trapped in the manor together. In between ghostly moans and spectral staff, Cat and Georgiana come face-to-face with real the scorching passion that’s been haunting their rivalry all along.

A f/f historical romances from a site favorite.

Want to order this one? We’ve got the links you need!.

Road Trip with a Vampire

Author: Jenna Levine
Released: September 23, 2025 by Berkley
Genre: Paranormal, Romance
Series: My Vampires #3

A vampire who can’t remember his past and a witch with secrets of her own hit the road in this zany, cross-country romantic comedy from beloved author Jenna Levine.

Reformed bad witch Grizelda “Zelda” Watson had hoped to never see another vampire again when she slipped away to sunny California for a fresh start. She’d grown tired of them and their nonsense ages ago. But when a vampire with amnesia unexpectedly shows up on her doorstep with a letter from her old friend Reggie, and asks for her help, she can’t say no. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that Peter Elliott is tall and gorgeous, looks great in yoga shorts, and has the kind of dark hair and surly expression Zelda’s been a sucker for for hundreds of years.

Peter isn’t completely harmless—he is fanged, after all—but he’s harmless enough, and soon becomes the only person in Zelda’s new life who knows the truth about what she is. If she can help him decipher the cryptic notes in his journal, the only clues to his lost memories, she might as well try before sending him on his way.

But when an alarming message from Peter’s past coincides with a clear sign that Zelda can’t keep running from her own, they embark on a cross-country road trip for answers—only to find what they’re looking for in each other.

A road trip with a witch and a vampire with amnesia.

Want this book? We can help: buy links ahoy!.

The Second Death of Locke

Author: V.L. Bovalino
Released: September 23, 2025 by Forever
Genre: Gothic, Romance, Science Fiction/Fantasy

Love. Loyalty. Sacrifice.

Grey Flynn has dedicated her life to her mage, Kier. She will be his blade on the battlefield, his healer and protector. The deep well of raw power inside her is Kier’s to wield. They are bound together by blood and magic, but there is one truth Grey dare not reveal . . . not even to Kier.

When a quest to protect the child of an enemy kingdom pulls them into a dangerous mission, Grey will need to decide what she’s willing to sacrifice to protect her secret.

For Grey is no ordinary magical well, and if she dies, all magic dies with her.

The Second Death of Locke is a devastatingly romantic epic fantasy about the undying bond between a knight and their mage, perfect for fans of Rachel Gillig and Alix E. Harrow.

Amanda: It’s the year of Lady Knights!

Want to order this one? We’ve got the links you need!.

Slashed Beauties

Author: A. Rushby
Released: September 23, 2025 by Berkley
Genre: Gothic, Horror, Historical: European

A gothic feminist body horror in two timelines revolving around three Anatomical Venuses—ultrarealistic wax figures of women—that come to life at night to murder men who have wronged them.

Seoul, present day. Antiques dealer Alys’s task is nearly complete. She has at last secured Elizabeth, the final anatomical Venus in a dangerously intertwined trio. Crafted in eighteenth-century London and modeled after real-life sex workers to entice male medical students to study female anatomy, these eerie wax figures, known as slashed beauties, carry unsavory lore. Legend has it that the figures are bewitched, and come to life at night to murder men who have wronged them. Now Alys embarks for England, where she knows what she must sever her cursed connection to the Venuses once and for all.

London, 1763. Abandoned and penniless in Covent Garden, wide-eyed Eleanor and another young woman, Emily, are taken under the wing of beautiful and beguiling Elizabeth, one of the city’s most highly desired courtesans. But as Eleanor is seduced deeper into a web of money, materialism, and men, it seems that Elizabeth may not be the savior she appears to be.

As past and present begin to intersect, it becomes clear that the women’s stories are linked in deeper, darker ways than it initially seems. And that the only method for Alys to end the witchcraft that binds her legacy is to gather all three models in one place and destroy them.

The problem is, Elizabeth is not ready to burn. Far from it. Centuries on, she is determined to rise again, and she will obliterate anything standing in her path. Including Alys herself.

Amanda: “…wax figures of women—that come to life at night to murder men who have wronged them.”

Elyse’s pick!

Want to order this one? We’ve got the links you need!.

Thief of Night

Author: Holly Black
Released: September 23, 2025 by Tor Books
Genre: Science Fiction/Fantasy
Series: The Charlatan Duology #2

The highly-anticipated sequel to the #1 New York Times bestselling author Holly Black’s stunning adult debut, Book of Night.

Night is made of shadows and shadows have teeth.

Charlie Hall, glue trap for disaster, crooked from the day she was born, who’d never met a bad decision she wasn’t willing to double down on, may have finally met her match.

After defeating Salt and stealing her lover—the powerful shadow, Vince—back from under the noses of the powerful Cabal leaders, she thought she’d won. Agreeing to become the Hierophant and risking her life hunting down dangerous rogue shadows seemed a small price to pay if she got to do it while being tethered to Vince.

But Vince is no longer the man she loved. The tethering process wiped away his memories of the last year, leaving only Red—the ruthless shadow who spent years as a killer for a cruel, mercurial billionaire. Red doesn’t remember Charlie and doesn’t like her.

So when Charlie is ordered to track down the Blight responsible for a massacre at a local church, she’s worse than just alone, heartbroken, and outmatched. She’s vulnerable. In a world where shadows have wills of their own, the question isn’t just how to survive. It’s how to protect yourself from the on thing you can never escape—your own shadow.

The latest Holly Black! We hope you caught her on the podcast.

Want this book? Here are helpful buy links..

Tourist Season

Author: Brynne Weaver
Released: September 23, 2025 by Slowburn
Genre: Contemporary Romance, Mystery/Thriller, Romance
Series: The Seasons of Carnage Trilogy #1

Welcome to Cape Carnage! Visit Once, Stay Forever.

Cape Carnage is a seaside town of colorful houses, quirky shops, and an unusually high body count. But with tourists comes trouble, and Harper Starling won’t let anyone ruin her picture-perfect home. A skilled gardener with killer instincts, Harper protects her sanctuary at any cost—especially for her aging mentor with a fading memory.

Troublesome tourists don’t check out of Carnage. They compost beneath Harper’s award-winning flowerbeds. But Nolan Rhodes isn’t your average tourist. Devilishly handsome, disarmingly charming, and skilled with a blade, Nolan is relentless in the pursuit of revenge. On every anniversary of the hit-and-run accident that fractured his life, Nolan slays another target. And he’s saved the best for last: the undeniably beautiful Harper Starling.

The problem? Harper isn’t the monster he expected. And she won’t go down without a fight. When an amateur true crime investigator comes to Cape Carnage on the trail of a long-lost serial killer, Harper and Nolan strike an uneasy truce. If Nolan helps Harper protect her town, she’ll keep quiet about his hunting habits . . . for now. But their alliance soon spirals into obsession, one that threatens to shatter every secret in Carnage—including their fragile love.

Tourist Season is a darkly funny, slow burn enemies-to-lovers romance where destruction and desire are balanced on the edge of a blade—and where love is the most dangerous battleground of all.

Amanda: I’ve been really charmed by Weaver’s blend of horror, dark humor, and romance.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/hide-your-wallet-september-23rd-release-week/

Want this book? Here are helpful buy links..

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=152049

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/a-trilogy-contemporary-romance-more-2/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151980

Ancillary Justice

Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie is $2.99! know Carrie really loves this book (and the entire series, I believe). It’s also a Hugo Award winner! Readers really loved the scifi world building, though some admitted wanting more action in the first book of the Imperial Radch series

Winner of the Hugo, Nebula, British Science Fiction, Locus and Arthur C. Clarke Awards.

On a remote, icy planet, the soldier known as Breq is drawing closer to completing her quest.

Once, she was the Justice of Toren – a colossal starship with an artificial intelligence linking thousands of soldiers in the service of the Radch, the empire that conquered the galaxy.

Now, an act of treachery has ripped it all away, leaving her with one fragile human body, unanswered questions, and a burning desire for vengeance.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

Beg, Borrow, or Steal

Beg, Borrow, or Steal by Sarah Adams is $1.99! This came out in January and is the third book in the Rome, Kentucky contemporary romance series. Have you read this one?

Two feuding second-grade teachers (and neighbors) find themselves teaming up in this rivals-to-lovers romance by the New York Times bestselling author of The Rule Book and Practice Makes Perfect.

Emily Walker hates having her carefully crafted world disrupted by anyone, most of all her legendary nemesis, Jack Bennett. He’s the opposite of the wonderful heroes she dreams up in her double life as a romance writer, which is why Emily was perfectly happy when Jack left Rome, Kentucky, mid-school year, with his fiancée. The last thing Emily saw coming was Jack’s return at the start of the summer after calling off the wedding and ending his relationship, but he’s here to stay—as her colleague and her neighbor.

Jackson Bennett is glad to be back, eager to renovate his house and work on the next mystery novel under his bestselling pen name. But when he realizes he’s now neighbors with the one woman who has always pushed his buttons, he discovers something he’s even more excited for—thwarting Emily and her petty plans to sabotage his return.

With their chemistry-fueled animosity at an all-time high, Emily accidentally sends an email to their school’s principal that could reveal her secret literary side hustle. She needs to steal back her manuscript, and Jack—she hates to admit—is just the man to help her. Surprisingly, Jack agrees. Will their unlikely alliance put an end to their rivalry? Or could it lead to a steamy plot twist they never saw coming?

You can find ordering info for this book here.

The Inheritance Trilogy

The Inheritance Trilogy by N.K. Jemisin is $2.99! This collection includes all three books, plus a novella. That’s almost 1500 pages for less than $3. Jemisin has won numerous awards, has been reviewed favorably on the site, and is really an amazing writer. Seriously, this is a steal. What are you waiting for?!

In this omnibus edition of N.K. Jemisin’s brilliantly original award-winning fantasy series, a young woman becomes entangled in a power struggle of mythic proportions.

A REALM OF GODS AND MORTALS.

Yeine Darr is an outcast from the barbarian north. But when her mother dies under mysterious circumstances, she is summoned to the majestic city of Sky. There, to her shock, Yeine is named an heiress to the king. But the throne of the Hundred Thousand Kingdoms is not easily won, and Yeine is thrust into a vicious power struggle.

The Inheritance Trilogy omnibus includes the novels: The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms, The Broken Kingdoms, and The Kingdom of Gods.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

How to Sell a Haunted House

How to Sell a Haunted House by Grady Hendrix is $1.99! This is a Kindle Daily Deal and was mentioned in a previous Hide Your Wallet.

When Louise finds out her parents have died, she dreads going home. She doesn’t want to leave her daughter with her ex and fly to Charleston. She doesn’t want to deal with her family home, stuffed to the rafters with the remnants of her father’s academic career and her mother’s lifelong obsession with puppets and dolls. She doesn’t want to learn how to live without the two people who knew and loved her best in the world.

Mostly, she doesn’t want to deal with her brother, Mark, who never left their hometown, gets fired from one job after another, and resents her success. But she’ll need his help to get the house ready for sale because it’ll take more than some new paint on the walls and clearing out a lifetime of memories to get this place on the market.

Some houses don’t want to be sold, and their home has other plans for both of them…

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/a-trilogy-contemporary-romance-more-2/

You can find ordering info for this book here.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151980

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/can-i-quote-you-on-that-2025

Posted by Jen

Woohoo!! National Punctuation Day is coming!

You know what to do!

I stand corrected.

Bakers, contrary to popular belief, those curved thingies are not sideways "happy hugs" for your text; they're parentheses. But I'll make this easy for you: YOU WILL NEVER NEED PARENTHESES ON YOUR CAKES. So don't use them. Ever.

No, not even for a name in all caps.

And not for anniversaries, either.

Gosh. I bet "Mom" is really feeling like part of the family right now.

Which brings me to my next point:

STOP IT WITH THE QUOTATION MARKS ALREADY.

Why are these numbers in quotes? Are they euphemisms or something? Are these people not really 13 and 59? And why does this keep happening, anyway?

Oh.

Thanks to Monica, Debb D., Tamara M., Alyssa V., Amy C., Rachel C., and Aurora C. for helping me cover parentheses and quotation marks. Tomorrow: COLONS! (You'll have to check back to see which kind.)

*****

P.S. And here's the official t-shirt of National Punctuation Day:

Punctuation Saves Lives

Proof that educating can also be entertaining!

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/can-i-quote-you-on-that-2025

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sparkly-lego-twilight/

Posted by SB Sarah

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151724

A | BN | K | AB

Y’all, Twilight is upon us. Born the same year as this here website, Twilight is celebrating it’s 20th anniversary October 7. (Note: I still have SBTB 20th Anniversary stickers, if you’d like one! They’re free!)

The celebrations will be in various quarters: The movie is back in theaters for a limited engagement, after teasing the re-release on Instagram. A limited number of theaters will be screening the five Twilight movies, one film per night for five nights, starting on October 29. The screenings also include a bonus roundtable with some of the folks involved, including Stephenie Meyer.

I think this is genius, honestly. In time for Halloween, and for a much-needed dose of nostalgic dopamine. Also, the first movie is tree porn.

I know other outlets are planning anniversary coverage, but one unexpected source of Twilight delight: Lego®!

I was taking a tour through the catalog, and thinking “Wow, there are a lot of new sets I’m digging.”

NB: some links include affiliate codes that send a portion of your purchase back to us at no extra cost to you. Thank you for your consideration.

Y’all know about my love of How to Train Your Dragon, right? There’s a Toothless:

A Lego Icons figure of Toothless wearing his mechanical tail and saddle harness. There's a lego articulated fish at his feet and he's breathing out a little cloud of clear air in lego form Lego Icons: Toothless – $70

I feel there is a strong chance I’m going to want this for my very own.

And there’s a Gameboy, which members of my household will covet:

A lego gameboy model made of grey, black and pink pieces, with tiles that look like game play screens and little cartridges for games like Zelda and SuperMario Lego Gameboy: $60.

Please note: there isn’t actual game play on this model. There are tiles that look like gameplay screens – I had to scroll and double check because I was confused how a functional Lego Gameboy was $60 – it’s not functional. BUT IT IS VERY COOL.

And then I got to the back pages of the catalog.

EVERYONE is going to want this.

THE CULLEN HOUSE IS A LEGO SET!

A model of the Cullen house from the movie, with a red pickup truck, a wolf, ,and three levels of a modern house with minifigs of Edward, Bella, Cullen and his wife, Bella's Dad, Jacob, and one of the sisters whose name I never remember. Twilight: The Cullen House – $220

“It’s a house, Sarah,” you might be thinking. “Lego® has plenty of those! There’s even an Italian Riviera scene where I could stage a recreation diorama of the BezoChez Merger and toss protest ducks and Bezos on a surfboard into the water!”

No, wait, that’s what I would do with the Italian Riviera set.

But yes, it is a house. BUT IT IS SO MUCH MORE.

It’s a Lego Ideas build, which means it was designed by a fan, LobsterThermidore, and uploaded for community voting. (Definitely read the descriptions – they’re hilarious).

This proposed build reached 10k votes, which means Lego folks took a look and said, “YES. THAT IS THE ONE.”

And I mean, honestly, that is the only right answer.

I am not exaggerating when I said the more I looked at it, the harder I chortled in complete delight.

Y’all.

First, this part is very important: the Minifigures:

EDWARD CULLEN WITH SPARKLE EFFECT?!

SPARKLE EFFECT??!!

And look, I even took my glasses off and looked close-close-close up, and in the images, I cannot discern any sparkle. Grumpypants, yes. Sparkle, not so much.

Minifig Sparkle Effect Edward and Bella at a lego piano. He looks grumpy but not sparkly.

Sparkle Effect Edward is grumpy and playing the piano with Regular Degular Bella.

Minifig sparkle effect Edward and regular degular Bella look at his record collection I think

Sparkle Effect Edward is grumpy watching Regular Degular Bella looking through his record collection.

Sparkle Effect Edward is grumpy in the kitchen with his Minifig Family — look at the size of that SPOON Cullen has in his “hand.” Is Sparkle Effect Edward about to get smacked? It was Rosalie who broke the bowl.

Even upon close examination of the image files, I can spot no sparkle.

Maybe this is a thing you can only appreciate when you own it? This Reddit user posted an album and…is that the sparkle effect? It looks more like a dermatology appointment is needed asap.

Setting aside Sparkle Effect Edward’s Alleged Sparkle Effect, I did notice three other things.

First, get a load of the hair on the Jacob minifig! I think it’s the same hair piece as Regular Degular Bella, but in black:

Second: you can build Jacob as a somewhat-articulated wolf:

The wolf looks bigger than Bella’s Dad’s truck. Pity he can’t ride in the back.

But finally, the part that sent me right off the edge of the chair I was sitting on:

THEY ARE IN A TREE.

IN A TREE!

Sparkle Effect Edward and Regular Degular Bella IN A GD TREEEEEEEE.

I don’t know why this cracked me up so much but I had to clean my glasses I was cry-laughing so hard. Even now I’m laughing.

Forget the house, the truck, the wolf, the Sparkle Effect Edward.

THEY ARE IN THE TREE.

Honestly, LobsterThermidor, if you thought of this, I offer you major applause.

Some of LT’s original ideas were stellar, and I don’t know if they’re part of the official set, like the “custom printed 1×1 tiles representing each book cover as wall art in the living room (or…dying room?)”

A cross section of the original design proposal showing an open fireplace and 1x1 wall art of lego-versions of the book covers. Including minifig arms holding an apple.

LOOK at that. Little Lego Minifigure arms holding an apple?!

And folks on Reddit noticed other “Easter eggs” hidden in the released design – references to deleted scenes, and odd items that were requests from Meyer, for example.

I just love everything about this, really. Every time I look at it, it makes me laugh. I even pulled the pages out of the catalog to save – spontaneous snort-laughter is in limited supply.

Are you going to climb a tree – I mean, buy this Lego set?

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sparkly-lego-twilight/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151724

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/sunday-sweets-flights-of-fancy-2025

Posted by Sharyn

Today, we're going to talk about the birds...

(By Viva la Tarta)

...and the bees.

(By Dlishcupcakes)

That's right! We're talking about Things that Fly!

(You look relieved. Why? What else would we talk about?)

There are kites:

(By Sweet Treats by Sandra)

...balloons in bunches:

(By Mutlu Dukkan)

...or filled with hot air:

(By K Noelle Cakes)

...and airplanes!

(by Gateau Delice)

Sometimes all at the same time:

(By That Baking Girl)

I'd make a kite/balloon/airplane joke here, but I think it'd go over your head.
:D

Let's see, what else?

There are dragonflies:

(By Joylicious Cakes)

...and dragons that fly:

(By La Torta Perfetta)

...which means they have to land somewhere.

Don't ever believe pigs can't fly.

(By Carlos Lischetti Sugar Art)

Heck, with enough thrust (or pixie dust) anything can fly.

All the way out of this world!

(By Cakey Cake)

In fact, if I could fly...

(By Alchemists of Cake)

...I think I'd Never Land.

Wouldn't that be Sweet?

Happy Sunday, everyone!

*****

P.S. Hang on, I can't believe we forgot butterflies!

I used this 84-pc butterfly set to make a gorgeous wreath for John's room, I know you crafters are gonna love them:

(3D Butterfly Wall Magnet Set)

They're double-sided and come with both magnets and stickers. Definitely browse the projects in the reviews, there are so many pretty ideas!

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/sunday-sweets-flights-of-fancy-2025

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sbtb-bestsellers-september-6-september-19/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151940

The latest bestseller list is brought to you by comfortable shoes, snack breaks, and our affiliate sales data.

Rules for Ruin by Mimi Matthews Amazon | B&N | Kobo
Manic Pixie Dream Earl by Jenny Holiday Amazon | B&N | Kobo
All Superheroes Need PR by Elizabeth Stephens Amazon | B&N
Shatter Me: The Six-Novel Collection by Tehereh Mafi Amazon
The Hexologists by Josiah Bancroft Amazon | B&N | Kobo
Someone to Cherish by Mary Balogh Amazon | B&N | Kobo
The Second Chance Book Club by Stephanie Butland Amazon | B&N | Kobo
Once Smitten, Twice Shy by Chloe Liese Amazon | B&N | Kobo
Along Came Amor by Alexis Daria Amazon | B&N | Kobo
Impractical Magic by Emily Grimoire Amazon | B&N | Kobo

I hope your weekend reading was magical!

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sbtb-bestsellers-september-6-september-19/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151940

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sunday-sale-digest-49/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151691

This piece of literary mayhem is exclusive to Smart Bitches After Dark, but fret not. If you'd like to join, we'd love to have you!

Have a look at our membership options, and come join the fun!

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/sunday-sale-digest-49/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151691

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/mimi-matthews-book-clubs-and-a-tahereh-mafi-collection/

Posted by SB Sarah

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151846

Buckle up, because I’m doing the books on sale post today, and it’s always chaotic when my scattered brain tries to remember things in order the way Amanda’s does.

Rules for Ruin

Rules for Ruin, the first book in Mimi Matthews’ The Crinoline Academy series, is $1.99! Lara reviewed this book and gave it an A (!!) saying, “This is my first Bad Decisions Book Club of 2025. Sleep became a distant memory with this book. For context, I have a newborn. I had the opportunity to sleep, but chose not to because this book was much more important.”

She gave up sleep, y’all. The second book, The Marriage Method, will be out on November 25. If you know you’ll want it, a heads up that this is the week of Thanksgiving, so preordering means SURPRISE BOOK when you might be super duper busy and maaaaybe ready to not talk to people for a bit.

No one betrays the Academy. But now Euphemia must break the rules for her enemy, or let the rules break her heart.

On the outskirts of London sits a seemingly innocuous institution with a secretive aim—train young women to distract, disrupt, and discredit the patriarchy. Outraged by a powerful politician’s systematic attack on women’s rights, the Academy summons its brightest—and most bitter—pupil to infiltrate the odious man’s inner circle. A deal is bring down the viscount, and Miss Euphemia Flite will finally earn her freedom.

But betting shop owner Gabriel Royce has other plans. The viscount is the perfect pawn to insulate Gabriel’s underworld empire from government interference. He’s not about to let some crinoline-clad miss destroy his carefully constructed enterprise—no matter how captivating he finds her threats.

From the rookeries of St. Giles to the ballrooms of Mayfair, Euphemia and Gabriel engage in a battle of wits and wills that’s complicated by a blossoming desire. Soon Euphemia realizes it’s not the broken promises to her Academy sisters she should fear. . . . It’s the danger to her heart.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

Shatter Me: The Six-Novel Collection

(Fingers crossed this deal stays put!)

Shatter Me: The Six Novel Collection by Tehereh Mafi is .99c at Amazon (and $19.99 elsewhere). This collection contains the entire series: Shatter Me, Unravel Me, Ignite Me, Restore Me, Defy Me, and Imagine Me. That is a LOT of books.

Lara recommended the first book in a post-apocalyptic Rec League in 2021, saying, “Tahereh Mafi’s Shatter Me series is YA dystopia (revolution, war/climate devastation, military rule and dominance) with an extremely intense romance at its heart, although the heroine does not end up with her first crush.”

Have you read this series?

Juliette can kill with a touch—will she wield her power for good, or will it turn her into the monster she’s always feared she truly is? Find out in the New York Times and USA Today bestselling Shatter Me series—all six novels are now available in this digital collection!

One touch is all it takes. One touch, and Juliette Ferrars can bring a grown man to his knees, begging for mercy. One touch, and she can kill.

No one knows why Juliette has such incredible power. It feels like a curse, like too great a burden for one person alone to bear. But The Reestablishment sees her as an opportunity. As a deadly weapon. And they’ll stop at nothing to shape her into what they want.

Juliette has never fought for herself before. But when she’s reunited with the one person who ever cared about her, she finds a strength she never knew she had.

This bestselling series from powerhouse author Tahereh Mafi showcases relentlessly thrilling action, heart stopping romance, and a war-torn world in which rebellion is the only path to freedom.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

How to Read a Book

How to Read a Book by Monica Wood is $1.99! This may be to coincide with the paperback release. Many reviewers describe this as a “book club book” which is some delightful inception marketing in my brain now: How to Read a Book is a book club book. And now the word “book” has lost its meaning.

Anyway, this book as a 4.26 (!!) star average on GoodReads, and readers describe it as emotional and hopeful on Storygraph. One reviewer on Kobo cautions that while they liked the heroine, they didn’t like that the pastor is a “judgmental pervert” and that the church people were “judgmental and unforgiving.” This reader didn’t like the book for that reason, but that would be a reason for me to read it faster. Another review says there are talking parrots, so this seems like a mixed bag. Have you read this book?

Do you know how to read How to Read a Book, a book that is for book clubs? (Ok, I’ll stop.)

National Bestseller * From the award-winning author of The One-in-a-Million Boy comes a heartfelt, uplifting novel about a chance encounter at a bookstore, exploring redemption, unlikely friendships, and the life-changing power of sharing stories.

Our Reasons meet us in the morning and whisper to us at night. Mine is an innocent, unsuspecting, eternally sixty-one-year-old woman named Lorraine Daigle…

Violet Powell, a twenty-two-year-old from rural Abbott Falls, Maine, is being released from prison after serving twenty-two months for a drunk-driving crash that killed a local kindergarten teacher.

Harriet Larson, a retired English teacher who runs the prison book club, is facing the unsettling prospect of an empty nest.

Frank Daigle, a retired machinist, hasn’t yet come to grips with the complications of his marriage to the woman Violet killed.

When the three encounter each other one morning in a bookstore in Portland—Violet to buy the novel she was reading in the prison book club before her release, Harriet to choose the next title for the women who remain, and Frank to dispatch his duties as the store handyman—their lives begin to intersect in transformative ways.

How to Read a Book is an unsparingly honest and profoundly hopeful story about letting go of guilt, seizing second chances, and the power of books to change our lives. With the heart, wit, grace, and depth of understanding that has characterized her work, Monica Wood illuminates the decisions that define a life and the kindnesses that make life worth living.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

The Second Chance Book Club

The Second Chance Book Club by Stephanie Butland is .99! I wonder if the Second Chance Book Club is as much of a book club book as How to Read a Book?

Hey, where are you going?

This book has a 4.4 star average on Goodreads, and 4.23 on Storygraph, and is about a woman named September who inherits a somewhat disheveled mansion, some money, and, along with it, a book club. Reviewers state that there are many references to other books, and that it’s very sweet and cozy.

Have you read this book? About book clubs?

Ok, I’m done now.

A heart-warming story about how a letter with surprising news changes everything – from the author of the beloved Found in a Bookshop
‘Compelling, eye-opening and heart-stirring, this book is unputdownable’ Katie Fforde

‘A warm and moving read with the healing power of books at its heart’ Kate Storey

‘A beautiful writer . . . such attentive compassion and warmth’ Carys Bray

‘Full of warmth, heart and most excellent book recommendations’ Zoë Folbigg

September was adopted when she was fifteen months old. She knows nothing about her early life, but she grew up safe and loved. Now, though, it’s just September and her feckless boyfriend Shaun. And she’s at her wits’ end. There’s never enough money, and she has nothing to look forward to.

Then a letter comes. September has inherited a house – and Shaun can see endless opportunities if she sells it. But, almost as soon as she sets foot in the garden, September knows she cannot let this home go. And she longs to find out more about the mysterious Lucia who left it to her.

When the members of Lucia’s book club arrive, for the first time September hears stories of her mother, of the aunt who adored her, and of the secrets that broke the family apart. And she begins to make new friends.

September feels safe here. But money alone can’t bring contentment. September is at the start of a journey full of surprises, shocks – and opportunities, if she’s brave enough . . .

You can find ordering info for this book here.

The Banned Bookshop of Maggie Banks

The Banned Bookshop of Maggie Banks by Shauna Robinson is $1.99 at Amazon – price-matching fairies, come on by! Katie mentioned this novel in a March 2024 Books on Sale post, saying it was good, and Heather S mentioned it in a Whatcha Reading post, saying, ” I really liked the characters. I knew it was women’s fiction, not romance, going in, so that was fine. It did have the “outsider comes in and in like 3 months knows a ton of people who will risk their jobs to help her so she can save everyone” trope, which annoyed me.” I also spotted this book recommended in a thread on Facebook for “recs with Gilmore Girls vibes.”

This book has a 3.81 average on Storygraph, and a 3.73 average on GoodReads. Robinson’s first book, Must Love Books, was on sale last month.

Have you read this one?

“A sparkling bookish story about rules just begging to be broken.” — Abby Jimenez, New York Times bestselling author of Part of Your World and The Friend Zone

I, Maggie Banks, solemnly swear to uphold the rules of Cobblestone Books. If only, I, Maggie Banks, believed in following the rules.

When Maggie Banks arrives in Bell River to run her best friend’s struggling bookstore, she expects to sell bestsellers to her small-town clientele. But running a bookstore in a town with a famously bookish history isn’t easy. Bell River’s literary society insists on keeping the bookstore stuck in the past, and Maggie is banned from selling anything written this century. So, when a series of mishaps suddenly tip the bookstore toward ruin, Maggie will have to get creative to keep the shop afloat.

And in Maggie’s world, book rules are made to be broken.

To help save the store, Maggie starts an underground book club, running a series of events celebrating the books readers actually love. But keeping the club quiet, selling forbidden books, and dodging the literary society is nearly impossible. Especially when Maggie unearths a town secret that could upend everything.

Maggie will have to decide what’s more important: the books that formed a small town’s history, or the stories poised to change it all.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/mimi-matthews-book-clubs-and-a-tahereh-mafi-collection/

You can find ordering info for this book here.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151846

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/hooray-for-online-piracy-2025

Posted by Jen

ARRRRRR, me mateys! Today be Talk Like a Pirate Day! So let's get starrrrted by going over arrr vocabularrrry with a quick pop quiz:

Q: Where are we going tonight?

A: To a BARRRRR.

Q: And what will we drink?

A. StARRRRla's Sangria!

Q. How will we get to the bar?

A. In a cARRRRR!

Q. What will we play during Karaoke?

A. Air guitARRRRR.

Q. What do we call this ugly golf ball cake?

A. SubpARRRRR

Q. What do dinosaurs say?

A. RARRRRRR!

Q. And finally, who's on our pirate flag?

A. The Jolly RogARRRRR - but this scalawag looks like an impostARRRRR!

Thanks to Suzanne S., Beth C., Rock, John M., Kelly H., Adrienne D., and Paul & Storm, who I blatantly ripped off honored with today's post.

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/hooray-for-online-piracy-2025

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/podcast/685-rt-rewind-august-1996-ads-features/

Posted by SB Sarah

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?post_type=podcast&p=151794

It’s the 90s so the Ads and Features from the August 1996 issue of Romantic Times are a treasure trove of confusion. We’ve got:

A tour of Jude Deveraux’s Grade II Listed Home in Suffolk
Barbara Cartland perfumes
How should emoji faces be written? Nose or no nose?
What is the appeal of “nursing him back to health” plots?
And RT is going to answer the eternal question that has plagued womankind throughout the ages. It’s a doozy.

Music: purple-planet.com

Listen to the podcast →

Read the transcript →

Here are the books we discuss in this podcast:

We mentioned:

Anne Rice: A Critical Companion by Jennifer Crusie (eBay) (Thriftbooks)
Barbara Cartland perfumes (eBay)
The Perfume Society’s remembrance of John Bailey, former president and personal perfumer to Barbara Cartland (that’s a job!?)
Jude Deveraux’s former home in Suffolk, Ketton House
Is this Peter Gallagher?

Ready for some 90’s visual aids? OH YES.

Most particular thanks to Live4Art on eBay, who takes terrific photographs

Show Spoiler

Brownwyne Wolfe's Once Upon a Tangled Tale: A photograph of a blonde woman in a wedding dress with giant puffy sleeves and a veil flying behind her, being embraced by a VERY blonde frost and tip John DeSalvo in a tux

Frost & Tip!

Lady of Fire by Janeen O'Kerry features a blonde John DeSalvo with no shirt and a kilt, and long gold hair He is lifting a woman with red hair in a nightgown into the sky. Seriously, his hand is under her thigh and her back is arched. Behind her is a giant fire

He’s throwing her into that fire, right?

Venus Rising by Flora Speer, A woman in a strapless gown or maybe a bedsheet is arching her back against the midsection of a shirtless man with a mullet. There's a folly or maybe a spaceship behind them

That looks like a spaceship folly.

The ad for Deeper than the Night - a vampire and a miniskirt! A man in a high collar cape and a mullet frowns while below him he embraces a woman in his cape. She's wearing a short black a line shirt and a button down shirt

The Vampire, and the Mini Skirt! (I would have killed, lol, for a skirt like that in high school.)

An ad for Sweet Rewards by Melinda McRae and Halfway Home by Bronwyn Williams. Sweet Rewards has a picture of two hats, one top hat and one wicker hat wrapped in fabric and topped with flowers. Halfway Home has a picture of a couple embracing and she looks like she's nursing from his naked chest.

HAT! Also – breastfeeding pose!

A not-great-resolution cover of Halfway Home showing the blonde heroine kneeling in front of the hero, whose shirt is unbuttoned and off his shoulders but still tucked in Behind them is a MASSIVE FIRE - it is making them glow so you know they're very close

Apologies for the low res image, but not only is she kneeling/about to bite his nipple/or something else, they’re IN A FIRE.

Everyone is on fire in this issue.

This caption has so much incredible information and is an entire journey.

Barbara Cartland perfumes! They’re on eBay, but I bet they don’t smell great.

An old image of Barbara Cartland in a gown with a single narrow strap and gathered fabric. Barbara's hair is curled around her head and she is wearing a pointed tiara

Check out this portrait of Dame Barbara! The gown, the tiara, the pose. Incredible.

Another ad that also shows how the pivot from clinch to single item covers is happening:

Someone Like You by Susan Sawyer in color - it's very pastel and pastoral, with a blonde woman in a pink gown kneeling in the grass between the knees of a open bloused mullet man who is holding her chin

Pastel and tender poses – looking the black and white covers up to see the color version is very fun.

And, one final cover: is this Peter Gallagher?

Andrea Kane's Echoes in the Mist shows a woman in a pink gown with ruffles, seated on a white iron bench with her legs over a man's lap. The man looks like Peter Gallagher, and he's wearing a burgundy coat and a cravat. They are posed in a garden with MUTANT LARGE FLOWERS like bigger than both of them.

Check out the flowers surrounding Peter Gallagher and his friend: MUTANT LARGE FLOWERS ATTACK!

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What did you think of today's episode? Got ideas? Suggestions? You can talk to us on the blog entries for the podcast or talk to us on Facebook if that's where you hang out online. You can email us at sbjpodcast@gmail.com or you can call and leave us a message at our Google voice number: 201-371-3272. Please don't forget to give us a name and where you're calling from so we can work your message into an upcoming podcast.

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https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/podcast/685-rt-rewind-august-1996-ads-features/

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?post_type=podcast&p=151794

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/witches-contemporary-romance-more-2/

Posted by Amanda

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151711

Libro.fm’s buy-one-get-one sale is happening from Sept 16-19, and you can get two audiobooks for one credit. And if you’ve been thinking of joining Libro.fm, you can get three audiobooks for the price of one if you’re a new member buying a one credit per month plan. This means if you use code SWITCH, you could end up with six audiobooks for three credits you receive on sign up.

A Psalm for the Wild Built

A Psalm for the Wild Built by Becky Chambers is $2.99! Sarah loved this one and gave it an A-. It was also her favorite read of 2021:

Thinking about that book brings back the feeling of awe and stillness and gratitude I had when reading it. It’s so peaceful and kind. I almost miss it (which is fixable because I can re read).

Hugo Award-winner Becky Chambers’s delightful new series gives us hope for the future.

It’s been centuries since the robots of Earth gained self-awareness and laid down their tools.

Centuries since they wandered, en masse, into the wilderness, never to be seen again.

Centuries since they faded into myth and urban legend.

One day, the life of a tea monk is upended by the arrival of a robot, there to honor the old promise of checking in. The robot cannot go back until the question of “what do people need?” is answered.

But the answer to that question depends on who you ask, and how.

They’re going to need to ask it a lot.

Becky Chambers’ new series asks: in a world where people have what they want, does having more matter?

You can find ordering info for this book here.

The Long Game

The Long Game by Elena Armas is $2.99! This is part of today’s Kindle Daily Deals. I remember this being a highly anticipated release given the popularity of Armas’s other books.

A disgraced soccer exec reluctantly enlists the help of a retired soccer star in coaching a children’s team in this smalltown love story in the vein of Ted Lasso and It Happened One Summer — from the New York Times bestselling author of The Spanish Love Deception.

Adalyn Reyes has spent years perfecting her daily routine: wake up at dawn, drive to the Miami Flames FC offices, try her hardest to leave a mark, go home, and repeat.

But her routine is disrupted when a video of her in an altercation with the team’s mascot goes viral. Rather than fire her, the team’s owner—who happens to be her father—sends Adalyn to middle-of-nowhere North Carolina, where she’s tasked with turning around the struggling local soccer team, the Green Warriors, as a way to redeem herself. Her plans crumble upon discovering that the players wear tutus to practice (impractical), keep pet goats (messy), and are terrified of Adalyn (counterproductive), and are nine-year-old kids.

To make things worse, also in town is Cameron Caldani, goalkeeping prodigy whose presence is somewhat of a mystery. Cam is the perfect candidate to help Adalyn, but after one very unfortunate first encounter involving a rooster, Cam’s leg, and Adalyn’s bumper, he’s also set on running her out of town. But banishment is not an option for Adalyn. Not again. Helping this ragtag children’s team is her road to redemption, and she is playing the long game. With or without Cam’s help.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

Must Love Scones and Secrets

Must Love Scones and Secrets by Maisy Magill is 99c! This is book one in the Moonshine Hollow series and is described as a cozy, fantasy romance with medium spice. I bought it out of curioisty.

He’s a prince longing for freedom.

She’s a baker yearning for the ultimate love story.

Together, they’ll discover that sometimes the sweetest magic lies in unexpected places.

Rosalyn’s enchanted scones bring magic to every bite at The Sconery and Teashop. With a glitter-sneezing caticorn and a thriving business, all Rosalyn needs is a romance as sweet as her baking. When a mysterious Rune Elf strides into Moonshine Hollow, bringing secrets and devastating charm, her perfectly-measured life crumbles faster than a day-old scone.

Bjorn is no ordinary elf. A secret prince looking for an escape, he’s determined to forge his own path far from the expectations of his royal family. When he’s tasked with helping a wild unicorn herd suffering from chaotic magic, he’s relieved to focus on creatures instead of people. That is, until a certain insistently-friendly baker and her pet crash into his carefully guarded solitude.

As Rosalyn and Bjorn work together to uncover the source of the magical imbalance in horned creatures, sparks fly in more ways than one. Her warmth and charm start to melt his icy walls, but Bjorn’s secret could shatter their fragile connection. Rosalyn dreams of the kind of love bards sing about, but will this gruff and guarded prince sweep her off her feet before it’s too late?

Must Love Scones and Secrets is a spicy cozy fantasy romance full of enchanted pastries, mischievous caticorns, and a love story that will warm your heart.

You can find ordering info for this book here.

The Ex Hex

The Ex Hex by Erin Sterling is $1.99! This is a light paranormal romance with some witchy elements. This one was…sweeter? More twee? than I had thought it’d be. I hope you get what I’m trying to say here.

New York Times bestselling author Rachel Hawkins, writing as Erin Sterling, casts a spell with a spine-tingling romance full of wishes, witches, and hexes gone wrong.

Nine years ago, Vivienne Jones nursed her broken heart like any young witch would: vodka, weepy music, bubble baths…and a curse on the horrible boyfriend. Sure, Vivi knows she shouldn’t use her magic this way, but with only an “orchard hayride” scented candle on hand, she isn’t worried it will cause him anything more than a bad hair day or two.

That is until Rhys Penhallow, descendent of the town’s ancestors, breaker of hearts, and annoyingly just as gorgeous as he always was, returns to Graves Glen, Georgia. What should be a quick trip to recharge the town’s ley lines and make an appearance at the annual fall festival turns disastrously wrong. With one calamity after another striking Rhys, Vivi realizes her silly little Ex Hex may not have been so harmless after all.

Suddenly, Graves Glen is under attack from murderous wind-up toys, a pissed off ghost, and a talking cat with some interesting things to say. Vivi and Rhys have to ignore their off the charts chemistry to work together to save the town and find a way to break the break-up curse before it’s too late.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/2025/09/witches-contemporary-romance-more-2/

You can find ordering info for this book here.

https://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/?p=151711

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/ow-2025

Posted by Jen

Presenting the world's most painful landing:

Or perhaps the world's most unfortunately shaped, colored, and placed mat logo.

Either way, I'm sure it made a real splash on the audience.

Beth C., would you care to join me in a casual crossing-of-the-legs?

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/ow-2025